


May we meet again (in the next life)

by Caskettmyheart



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: AU, Clarke and Lexa play the most important role, F/F, My take on what would happen if reincarnation was real, alternative universe
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-03-16
Updated: 2016-03-31
Packaged: 2018-05-27 04:27:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,505
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6269671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Caskettmyheart/pseuds/Caskettmyheart
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU: They may not have had the happy ending in their past life, but in the next, modern one, they get a new chance. Reincarnated Clarke knows bits and pieces of her past life, but one major part remains a mystery for years. Who is the brunette she always sees in her flashes and dreams? </p>
<p>Not meant to become a long story. Will add a chapter or two later.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Beginning

**Author's Note:**

  * For [All the LGBTQIA+ People who deserve better](https://archiveofourown.org/gifts?recipient=All+the+LGBTQIA%2B+People+who+deserve+better).



> Clarke, reincarnated Clarke and Lexa are the main characters. The other reincarnations are slightly altered in name (if I could think of another one that was similar).

The first time she had memories like these, she was seven. She’d been playing with two dolls. One was brunette and had wavy hair while the other had more straight locks of blonde hair. She’d gotten a flash of a girl with a gorgeous but rare smile. As soon as it had come, it had gone.   
When she’d described the person to her mother, the response was that they didn’t know anyone that looked like the girl and it must have been someone she’d made up in a dream. This confused her; It hadn’t been a dream at all. It was real, very real. _Who is she?_

 

When she was eleven, she learned that every face you saw in a dream, you’d seen before. Even if only your subconscious remembered but you didn’t actively realize it. It was then that she realized the girl she’d been seeing in her recent dreams was more than just a figment of her imagination. It had to be someone she knew. Still, whenever she looked around her, she could never spot her. She started to wonder about the woods she saw at night, and her hair colored red. Her scars from fights of survival and her hair getting dirtier with every dream. _What is this place?_

 

When she was fourteen, she had her first kiss from a boy. During the kiss, she remembered pushing a knife into the pale flesh of a boy tied to a pole, and the girl from before was watching her with a grim expression. She’d been so freaked out she ran to the bathrooms and washed away the stains of blood that were never even there. Once her hands were red and puffy like her eyes, she stopped and looked at herself in the mirror. _Am I a killer?_

 

She celebrated her fifteenth birthday surrounded by her few close friends. Afraid of flashing lights at the parties people always threw, and seeing dead bodies surrounding her and the still nameless girl. Monty and Jay were understanding, happy to share a pizza and talk all night. She’d told them of the flashes of some life she couldn’t remember and they’d been nothing but supportive, if somewhat weary. Beau was a whole other story. He didn’t seem to understand her fascination with the girl, or her fear of the rest of the story. His sister Octavia was all for the mysterious stories of this foreign land. Whenever they talked about these lands, Octavia dreamed aloud of all the possibilities, and becoming a great fighting badass herself. She just found new hope and comfort in the fact that she wasn’t the only one curious about this world, or the people there. Though she didn’t always share everything with the group. Like the feeling in the tips of her fingers when she had a flash of her and the brunette shaking arms. Or the skip of her heart when she watched the brunette fight someone in the middle of a square surrounded by hundreds of people who did nothing to save her from very near death. Why didn’t they save her? _Why didn’t I save her?_

 

When the dreams stopped six months later, she didn’t know how to feel about it. The flashes became less frequent and eventually came as little as once every two months. She started to enjoy life more, not having the issue of flashing lights scaring her into a flash or of loud music making her hear gunshots. She didn’t visit the woods or the big tower with people speaking in a different tongue much anymore. With that came not seeing the brunette she’d come to know as Heda. She didn’t know what it meant or if it was a name in their language but it was the only thing she could hear when having a flash other than incoherent sounds. But Heda was beautiful and powerful and obviously meant a lot to whoever’s mind she was in. She didn’t want to stop seeing her. Eventually, she had no choice in the matter. Her mother thought it was a blessing that they stopped. But she felt a strong connection to Heda and the longer they were divided, the stronger the desire to see her became. _Why can’t she be real?_

 

She spent the night of her seventeenth birthday alone on the roof of her house, underneath a blanket of stars and the bright light of a full moon. All her friends were out somewhere but she only desired to see Heda tonight. It had been five months since the last flash. That long pause had caused that she was starting to forget what Heda looked like. She was thankful the last flash had only been about Heda and her. No one else. The brunette had been sleeping peacefully on a couch in a room covered with fur and candles. She had been positioned sitting opposite her, drawing with charcoal on a piece of rough paper, capturing her features as best she could, trying to do her beauty justice. Then Heda jerked awake and the flash skipped to her brushing her fingers over Heda’s skin. She discovered then Heda had tattoos. She had snapped out of the flash before she could discover more, and immediately started to draw the tattoos and the drawing of Heda she’d made in the flash. She promised herself then to get the same infinity tattoo with 4 dots if this was the last flash she’d have before she turned 18.   
But that night, while wishing upon a falling star, she got lucky. She fell asleep on the roof not long after two in the morning and dreamt about the brunette. They were having a discussion in a sort of tent. Before she knew it, she was pushing forward, daring Heda to stand up to her. However when she was eventually backed into the table, she’d lost all anger towards Heda for what she’d done before the dream started. As the brunette reached for her, she blinked rapidly before a pair of soft lips touched hers and she felt a while new sort of happiness. It didn’t last long for her to pull back, even though she’d enjoyed the kiss. She couldn’t do it. Not because she wasn’t attracted to her – she certainly was, but because of the lingering guilt of all the past events she’d had flashed and dreams of before.   
Then scenery changed and a sudden sadness spread into her chest. She didn’t have to be able to hear the words to know what was going on. She – or her dream self – had to leave. If she’d ever return was uncertain and there was pain and sorrow of moments of what could have been expressed in wordless thoughts and feelings. She walked into the same room as the last time she’d had a flash but now Heda was coming from behind the bed, looking more beautiful than ever. But her face was filled with sadness. The same sadness that was probably displayed on her own face as well. She took a deep breath and saw Heda’s demeanor fade from leader to girl. From powerful and a fighter to unsure and a lost soul.

And suddenly, for the first time since she started having the flashes and dreams, there was sound. Not just gunshots and screaming or heaving. No, soft words, kind words being spoken to each other.   
_“When do you leave?”  
“Now.” _ It hurt to say it out loud. To make it final. She only received a nod, but she couldn’t just leave it like this. Leave them like this. In this state of limbo between friends, partners, and lovers. So she stepped forward and apologized.   
_“Don’t be, you have to go back; They’re your people.”_ She had the feeling she hated that line. It brought responsibility forced on her because no one else would take it. She knew more now than she’d ever known before. About the dreams, the flashes and the world displayed within. She knew what she’d done for her people and what Heda had done for hers. How there had been anger between them but also tenderness. How she’d lost people time and time again. _“That’s why I- “  
_ Her head jerked up. _Lexa_. That was her name. Lexa, a beautiful girl she could have – no, the beautiful girl she did love in this world was called Lexa and she was the purest thing to ever be imperfectly perfect to her. And this girl just nearly told her she loved her. _“That’s why you’re you.”_ She said it with enough meaning for them both to know it would only be more heartbreaking to part later if they exchanged ‘I love you’s’ now. But it was the second best thing she could have heard in that moment. It triggered something inside of her dream self. She knew who she was, or who she had been experiencing all these years. She was Clarke, the mighty Wanheda, leader to her Skaikru and falling for the girl standing in front of her since they started their coalition.   
_“Maybe someday you and I will owe nothing more to our people.”_ How badly she wanted that moment to come soon couldn’t never be expressed in words.   
_“I hope so…”_ Lexa - oh how wonderful it was to be able to see this all more clearly now and give her a name – said.   
When they shook hands, her heart stopped, realizing if this was going to be the last touch they shared, she’d die of longing for more.   
_“May we meet again,”_ the soft caring voice spoke. Her heart made the decision for her.   
She lifted her hand up to Lexa’s neck and pulled her in for a kiss she’d been longing for so long. And then she was crying, and her tears mingled with Lexa’s because this was as magical as it was tragic and they both knew that this would be the last moment they’d spend together in a long time. So they kissed and shared their feelings the only way they knew how to. By loving each other for as long as they could.

She felt the strokes of her fingertips tracing lines on her skin. She felt the smile her lips formed as they messed up their hair. She felt the trails of kisses on her neck and body. She felt her breathing get heavier the longer they kissed and touched and loved each other. She could hear Lexa’s laugh as she tried something out Lexa found hilarious. She experienced it all again like it was the first time. She felt like she could rule the world.

 

When they were lying next to each other in bed, her fingertips tracing Lexa’s tattoos, she felt truly happy since she’d landed on the ground and took in the nature around them. She couldn’t help but smile as Lexa shushed her. And then again when she asked to talk about something else. Oh she laughed at the thoughts her dream-self had of thinking of the perfect response.   
“We don’t have to talk at all.”   
The smile that started at Lexa’s lips and transferred into her eyes was one of the most gorgeous sights her eyes had ever captured. And she’d been in space. The smile disappeared into the kiss and their movements turned playful and serious at the same time. Lexa’s hand traveled over her body and she got the goosebumps to match. She never wanted to leave this moment behind.

 

Yet she had to, for her true self woke up after that moment. She was confused, happy, sad, and lonely. Happy because of what Clarke had experienced. Sad because she assumed this had been Clarke’s last moment with Lexa. Confused because of how this was supposed to go on and lonely for the simple reason that she already missed being Clarke and having Lexa by her side.

 

She climbed back into her room through the window and googled anything she could find on people named Lexa and Clarke. She even looked for Wanheda – though she knew from her search of the word Heda that it would result in nothing coherent – and the Ark. She had all these memories or a girl she didn’t even know. But then it occurred to her. _Is reincarnation real?_


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter takes a little turn in style of writing, simply because I reached “the present”, and couldn’t see myself writing it in the same style. Plus, present-day-Clarke has a name now!  
> Enjoy  
> \--

**Chapter 2**

For a while, Lexa was on her mind constantly. She couldn’t help it. The touches and kisses she’d felt and experienced during her dream had felt so real and so meaningful that they haunted her. She wasn’t sure where to put these feelings she was having. The fact that she was even feeling so strongly about this kind of scared her. She’d never really experienced or developed feelings for a girl before… There was no way she could talk to Jay or Monty about this. Beau was out of the question. Octavia perhaps? She sighed to herself as she ran her hands through her hair. She was so conflicted. She didn’t want to forget Lexa, not at all. The drawings of her tattoos and face were gathered in one of her desk drawers, proof of her absolute certainty never to forget the literal girl of her dreams. She was absolutely gorgeous but seemed so much more than her exterior – which seemed to be a complete opposite of the people she met nowadays. _What would it be like to meet someone like her?_

 

But after a few weeks, she stopped drawing the lemniscate on her wrist and the memories of the dream started to fade. She involuntarily stopped thinking about Lexa’s lips or her hands and started to think about school stuff and hanging out with friends again. Now that she was honest, she had missed them over the summer. Their final year together as seniors had to be great and she just couldn’t discard that to live in a fantasy world that may have existed a long time ago. If she was Clarke’s reincarnation, she could only hope to run into her Lexa one day. _But when will that day come?_

 

Four weeks into her senior year, she started to get to know a few new people. She wasn’t discarding her friends, but she liked these new people. They seemed less pumped up on hormones and school kids, and more like down to earth people who knew who they were and what they stood for. One of these people, was a girl named Nila. If she ever felt something for a girl, it was Nila who sparked that feeling. She’d heard a few rumours about Nila being into all kinds of people, girls were no exception. But that wasn’t what drew her to the blonde, no. There was something about her eyes and posture that got her attention. The sexuality confirmation just seemed to make it more approachable. So, when Nila asked her to go see a movie the next week, she didn’t hesitate to take her up on the offer. _Am I really doing this?_

 

“Clara?” She heard her name being whispered into her ear as her eyes were fixed on the screen. She hummed in response, and slowly turned her head, eyes still fixed on the screen until the very last second. When she did turn, she noticed how close Nila was sitting to her, leaning into her seat. Their lips nearly touched. There was a bright playful spark in Nila’s eyes, which only sparked excitement in her own body.  
“You want to kiss me, don’t you?” Well, not that it was entirely unexpected, because she hadn’t been very subtle in the past week, but she was surprised Nila asked and didn’t just kiss her instead.  
Her lips parted ever so slightly, her voice lost. Eventually she just gave her the tiniest nod which seemed to do the trick. Nila leaned in, and so did she. Their lips touched each other in an entirely different way than the way Clarke’s had touched Lexa’s. Yes, in that moment, her last dream flooded back to her. But she pushed it to the very back of her mind. She didn’t want this to be the one thing she thought of now. Now, she just wanted to enjoy her very first kiss from a girl.

It was hard, fast paced, and exciting. So exciting that they had to stop to catch their breaths after barely a minute. Nila’s hand was in her hair, and her own was at the base of Nila’s neck. The feeling of fingers scratching her scalp set her on to lean in and crash her lips into Nila’s once more. The film being played in the background was long forgotten. _I am doing this_.

 

In the hallways at school, the two blondes walked beside each other, the back of a hand grazing alongside the other but never touching. No one knew, and they wanted to keep it that way for as long as they were still in the dating stage. It was more fun and games than anything serious, but it seemed to be exactly what she needed right now.

 

Octavia was the first to figure it out. She promised not to tell, and she trusted the brunette not to. She wasn’t really surprised she was the one to figure it out, seeing as she herself was having a secret relationship and noticed the signs right away.  
“I know how it feels,” Octavia had started, soft enough only she could hear.  
“Huh?” She’d simply responded, not getting what this was about or where it came from. They’d been talking about what Octavia, Nila, Link and she would get for lunch, walking through the halls when suddenly, Octavia changed the subject.  
“Wanting to keep it to yourself a little while longer.” She nodded towards Nila and Clara’s hands playing with each other. Then she grinned and bit her lip, nodding to her own doing the same with Link’s. “Don’t worry, secret’s safe with me.”

She nearly blushed, happy Nila didn’t know what was being said.  
“Oh and uh, nice catch Princess.” Octavia winked at her and now she was really blushing. Nila didn’t take long – from the second they were alone – to tease her about it. Still, she received a heated kiss because, in Nila’s words, it was irresistible. Needless to say the first class after lunch, she couldn’t concentrate for even a second.

 

Though her relationship with Nila was great – yeah they moved on from dating to a real relationship – she felt as though there was something missing. They’d been together for a little over three months and the holidays had brought a whole new type of stress with them. She’d always liked them, but Nila absolutely hated them. There was a reason for it, but it wasn’t one they talked about much. In fact, they’d stopped talking about meaningful things for several weeks. All they really did was make-out, talk about daily things – which was still really nice. But there was just something missing between them.  
Nowadays, they walked through the hallways, hands linked together because either everyone at school knew already, or they just didn’t seem to notice. They stole kisses in between classes when crossing each other. They met up after school to do homework. Her mom was out most of the time either way, so they didn’t disturb any family affairs (or got caught, which was nice to avoid).

 

Their first day back at school after the winter break, they had to split up for class in the morning and wouldn’t see each other until lunch. Normally, they’d cross in the hallways and exchange glances or a kiss, but on Mondays … Well, who was every lucky on a Monday?  
She walked into class, completely expecting everyone to be in their regular seats or chatting to their friends till the very last second. But she noticed – as did everyone else – that there was someone in her seat. She always took the seat on the third row, nearest to the window. Whether it was left or right in that particular classroom didn’t matter. The third seat to the back was perfect because she could glance out the window and draw, or pay attention if the topic was particularly interesting. Whatever she wanted, would do in her seat. But now there was someone sitting there. Someone who’s face she didn’t know. Not immediately anyways. It was hard to tell from the back. The girl was looking out the window, her back turned towards the class. So, she decided to do what everyone was apparently doing: she walked over to her group of friends and talked about the new girl. Monty, Octavia, Jay and she all had history on Monday morning, so at least she had a group to go to. Her friends had already claimed their regular seats, having had no other new people interrupt their normal rhythm.

“Where am I supposed to sit?” she said, casting an annoyed glance towards the girl. Her hair was brown and sort of wavy.

Jay yawned before responding sleepily, “Good morning to you too, Sunshine.” She gave him a nudge in the shoulder.  
“She was already there when we arrived.” Octavia looked bored. She didn’t really like history.  
“Can’t just ask her to move, can I?” she groaned softly. She didn’t want to be rude or anything, but she wasn’t feeling like paying attention to the lesson that was about to start.  
“You know what? I don’t think Marvin is going to show today. He was sick on Friday, remember? I’ll take his seat. You take mine and get to know Mystery Girl over there. Alright?” Octavia wasn’t just offering from the kindness of her heart – she knew she’d repay the favor later – but for now it was very nice of her to do. Though, she wasn’t sure if she really wanted to get to know the brunette sitting in her regular seat.

 

As the bell rang, she realized there probably wouldn’t be much time for chit chat either way. She took the seat Octavia normally sat in, while Octavia was now sitting next to Jay and Monty a row in front of her. For a while, she really did try to pay attention to what her professor was saying, but it was all so dull. It was too cold in the room, she hadn’t had a decent breakfast this morning, she was in a different seat which felt really weird, and on top of that, she was extra sleepy.

 

She blamed it on the sleep deprivation at first, seeing no possible other way around this. Then she figured the flashes just must have returned. Maybe that was it, yeah probably. But then, why was she having flashes of the girl of her dreams – Lexa – in regular clothes and scribbling down notes in a modern day notebook. She’d never had flashes of another lifetime before. Only from that desolate planet in which she was known as Wanheda.

She shook her head and blinked rapidly to rid the image from her mind. Octavia, who had been talking to her, regarded her with a curious look. A questioning look. One that said: _another flash?_

She just shrugged, unsure how to respond because she didn’t even know what it was yet. She reassured Octavia she was fine before glancing sideways again, at the girl with long brown hair.

 

It was the splitting image of the girl from her dreams. Lexa had the same kind of hair – only slightly dirtier – and had more paint on her face. But it was her. There was no doubt. Even from the half side profile she got, she saw Lexa before her. With that, came the touches and kisses from her last dream. That warm feeling spread through her chest again. She saw the same hands supporting the girl’s head now as she’d seen disappearing underneath sheets in her dream half a year ago. She just couldn’t stop staring at this girl. She was beautiful, and something intrigued her to get to know her better. If not just because she’d been seeing the previous life, or imagining, of this girl in her dreams.

 

It turned out she’d been staring a bit too long a tad too unsubtle, because the girl took notice and looked up, her face turning and hand falling on her desk. She didn’t even look away as the girl’s eyebrows furrowed slightly, clearly indicating discomfort at this strange situation. However, she noticed the girl had the same – if not more beautiful – piercing green eyes Lexa had. But then she was snapped out of her trance when the girl’s voice flowed through her ears like a sweet melody.  
“Is something wrong?” She asked, and Clara could make up about a hundred things to say right about now, but nothing seemed right.  
“A-Eh- No.” Well that was strange. “Sorry,” she trailed as the folds in the girl’s forehead smoothed out. She decided to just go for it, and hope for the best. And not to make a complete fool of herself. “It’s nothing really. But, do you mind if I ask you a question?” she asked.  
The girl’s lips spread into a small smile before resting her chin on her hand again.  
“You just did,” she whispered softly, trying not to disrupt the class or draw attention to herself, “But go ahead.”  
She figured she couldn’t lose anything by trying to take the first step in getting to know her, so she just went for it.  
“It just seems like I know you from somewhere, and I was trying to figure out how.” Well that’s not an exact lie.  
“Oh.” The girl seemed to think for a moment, looking down at her notebook, doodling in the meantime. “No, you don’t seem familiar to me. Sorry.”  
So far nothing, she thought. She should have known it was too good to be true. There was no way this was going to be the reincarnation of Lexa like she was the one of Clarke. There would be no way two souls could be so lucky to end up in the same era, the same decade, nor the same age, twice. And besides, if she really was present-day Lexa… Wouldn’t she remember? Or was she a special case. A weirdo?

 

Now, it was the girl’s turn to study her. She guessed it was only fair to let her look. Then it occurred to her to just introduce herself. Just because she wasn’t who she’d hoped the girl was, didn’t mean they couldn’t become friends, or at least decent classmates who knew each other’s name.  
“I’m Clara, by the way.” She stuck out her right hand towards the seat on her right side.

The girl turned to mirror the image with her right hand properly. Instead of just reaching for her hand however, the girl went for her forearm, took it in a firm, yet gentle grasp and shook their arms.  
“I’m Lexi.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I didn't really mean for this to become a high school fic? It won't have many chapters probably, but I'm not going to spend the remainder chapters in the classrooms.  
> Thanks for reading.  
> Feedback is always appreciated seeing as this is my first The 100 fic. (Thank Jflop for that one.)
> 
>  
> 
> As always: questions or discussions you want to reach me with: Caskettmyheart.tumblr.com


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This word count is like the previous two chapters combined. Mainly because I felt this needed more than a high school setting - which I didn't plan on giving this story in the first place. 
> 
> I hope you like it.

**Chapter 3**

 

So, Lexi was exactly like Lexa. In many ways. One of them being their physical appearance. The other being the fact that she felt an immediate pull towards the girl. At first she’d brushed it off, but then when she found out her name was Lexi, there was no possible doubt in Clara’s mind that she was in fact the present day life of Lexa and that pull changed. It was like an involuntary response to the knowledge she’d loved this girl in another world. But then there was the fact that she was in a relationship with an amazing girl who she liked. Nila was great. She was what she needed, really. A distraction from the world of dreams and flashes, and school. She needed that. But, did she need a distraction or did she need Nila?

 

That first Monday at lunch, Clara saw Lexi walk into the big cafeteria all alone. No one walked alone around school. She was always with her friends or Nila, so she felt obligated to help Lexi find her way around in this jungle people called a school.   
“Hey, do you mind if I get the new girl to sit with us? I don’t think she knows anyone around here,” she said to the others. Octavia and Monty looked over their shoulders towards the entrance she nodded to. Both of them shrugged and didn’t seem to mind.   
“She didn’t take our seat in history this morning. If you can stand her for making you actually pay attention in class, so can we.” Jay gave her a grin, and she shoved him. Nila walked towards their round table as she was about to get up.   
“Hey babe, where you going? I haven’t seen you all day,” Nila gave her a begging look. She gave her a quick peck on the lips before responding.   
“I’m going to show the new girl how the bar works. I don’t think she has any friends yet. I’ll bring her back to the table and introduce her, alright?” She let her hand slide down Nila’s arm as she stepped back until their fingers released. She turned and strode towards Lexi, who looked a bit lost in the line at the bar, while Nila took her regular seat next to Clara’s at the table.   
“New girl?” Nila asked, not really knowing anything yet. Octavia filled her in.   
“Yeah, she was just in class this morning. She took Clara’s seat, so I let her sit in mine to get to know the new girl. I figured she could politely kick her out of her seat but that didn’t happen. They talked all lesson long.”   
“Huh,” Nila nodded, giving the pair at the bar a curious look.

Meanwhile, Clara had joined Lexi.   
“Hey, found your way to the most judgmental place of the entire playground, huh?” She grinned at Lexi who smiled upon her arrival.   
“Yeah, barely. People are staring. Why are they staring?” Lexi cast a nervous glance around. Clara followed her gaze and noticed quite a few people were actually watching them.   
“You’d think they’d be used to new kids showing up during the year, but it doesn’t actually happen that often.” Clara raised an eyebrow at one particular girl who was giving Lexi heart eyes. Lexi didn’t seem to notice, though.   
“Oh, okay.” Lexi seemed a little shy now that they were here. In the classroom, she’d seemed fine. They’d talked about some stuff, like her doodles and classes she would be taking. Clara had found out they’d be in a couple of them together. Including Maths, English literature and PE.

Clara patiently waited for Lexi to grab all she needed for lunch and payed before suggesting what she’d come there to do.   
“Want to come sit with me and my friends? I don’t really know what it’s like not to know anyone here, but it can’t be fun. Especially at lunch.” Lexi seemed happy she’d suggested it. That was a good sign.   
“Yeah, I’d like that. Thanks Clara.” She just shrugged in response and led the way towards their table. It was no big deal really. She was just being friendly.

Nila stood up when Clara reached the table and surprised her by giving her a deep kiss. Her eyes shot open but she soon melted into the kiss. That was until she registered Octavia, Jay and Monty all making noises that were either along the lines of ‘Ew, PDA’ or ‘Feel free to ignore us’.   
Nila pulled back from the kiss and sat herself down while Clara stood there, in the middle of the cafeteria, stunned and blushing. Meanwhile, Lexi just looked very uncomfortable.   
“Um, Lexi, that’s Nila. She’s my girlfriend.” Clara was very uncomfortable as well, having no idea why Nila just did that. “Ahem, and that’s Octavia, Monty and Jay.” She cleared her throat again before taking her seat. There was an empty seat between Nila and Octavia, so Lexi sat herself there.   
Octavia soon started chatting with Lexi, getting to know the girl. Clara took this opportunity to question Nila.   
“What the fuck was that?” she hissed.   
“What?” Nila was acting all innocent.   
“You know what. You made me feel uncomfortable. Why did you do that?” She was so not okay with Nila just dismissing her.   
“I hadn’t seen you all weekend, I missed my girlfriend. Sorry,” she scoffed, and Clara knew she didn’t mean it. But instead of wasting her energy on a pointless argument, she turned towards the conversation Monty and Jay were having.

 

Two weeks after that Monday, Lexi was fully integrated into the school and group of friends, though Nila was still rather hesitant towards the girl and Clara was getting tired or it, but she didn’t feel like dealing with it. She hadn’t seen a lot of her girlfriend recently. Instead, she’d spent more time with her group of friends. They were all getting to know Lexi more and more.   
She hadn’t gotten any new flashes since Lexi came into the picture, but she had gotten moments in which she would look at Lexi, and see a fragment of her dream or previous flashes on her eyelids as she blinked. It was confusing at times, seeing Lexi and thinking of Lexa. By now, she was sure the girl had absolutely no recollection of the life she saw that they’d lived before. She’d dropped some hints in the girl’s presence, but there’d never been any reaction. She’d found it hard to hide her disappointment at first, not really being sure how to feel about it. Did she want Lexi to know what she knew? Did she really want to bring that burden on the girl? On the other hand, if Lexi would have known, she’d have a person to talk about all the things she knew. About the other world inside her mind. About the people she’d lost. About that boy she killed. She figured by now that her friends existed in that universe too. She hadn’t really had dreams where she’d seen them, but it was a given. But why did no one but her have any recollections of this world?

 

 

“What do you mean by ‘changed’?” Octavia asked her for clarification.   
“I mean, do you think Nila’s changed in the three months we’ve been dating?” Clara asked her friend. She was getting more and more annoyed at Nila’s behavior and she felt like things were changing between them.   
“No, I don’t think so. She’d still the same person. Still carefree on the outside but hurt on the inside,” Octavia reconsidered, “Though, don’t tell her I know that.”   
“I just feel like we’re drifting apart.” She sighed as she finally allowed herself to voice her concerns aloud. “We don’t talk about anything but superficial things. I seem to know nothing about her besides what she likes in bed.”   
“Woah, okay. Too much information, Clara.”   
“Sorry…” Clara huffed and tightened her grip on the books clutched to her chest. They were standing at Octavia’s locker. Clara was waiting on her friend to finish up before their last period was about to start. They had PE on Friday afternoon so she was going to try and forget all about her inner problems with Nila as they ran track. She glanced down the hall and saw Nila standing by her own locker. Their eyes met and Nila gave her a wave from the other side. Why wait and keep this on her mind while she could just get it over with? “Hey, I’m going to go talk to Nila, alright? I’ll see you in PE.” Before Octavia could even respond, she was walking away. She’d made up her mind. She was sure. And this had nothing to do with Lexa. Or that pull she felt towards Lexi. This was just something she had to do to clear her own mind. _Right_.

 

 

“Wow, you two are really awkward now. I liked that PDA more than this awkward fiddling,” Octavia complained.

“Believe me, I didn’t mean to make it this awkward. Not for any of us.” Clara shifted her gaze from her ex to the plate filled with gross food in front of her. “They should really make our lunch healthier if they’re always complaining about us being not active enough.” She poked her food, “Seriously, there’s nothing nutritious about this piece of plastic cheese.” She’d forgotten her lunch at home because she’d overslept. It hadn’t really been a good weekend. Her nights had been pretty sleepless and her mind had often drifted towards memories Lexa and Clarke. Sometimes wishing she could have that with someone, and at other times wishing she never knew any of it. She’d been happy for months, why couldn’t that just continue? Why did Lexi had to come into their world? It would have been easier without her in the picture. Now she was reminded of her flashes every single day.

“Hey, girls!” Lexi said as she joined the pair at the table. It would be the three of them today. Jay and Monty had some kind of meeting with one of their clubs.   
“Hey,” she gave Lexi a smile, a flash of Lexa sitting in a chair, playing with a knife played in the back of her mind. If she recalled correctly, it was the first meeting between Clarke and Lexa. She had no idea why her mind was recalling that particular flash, but she felt something strange between her and Lexi.

Their conversation was as it always was, nothing special. Until Octavia joined Link at his table, then things took … an interesting turn.   
“Hey, um, Clara?” Lexi had a weird look on her face. What was up with that?   
“Yeah?” she responded, curious what this was about.

“Would you maybe, I mean, you don’t have to but… Would you like to go see a movie with me at the drive in?” Her heart fluttered. It was involuntary and strange but kind of wonderful at the same time. A radiant smile broke through her confusion from earlier.   
“Oh- Okay, yeah that sounds like fun.” She could get used to this. She’d been wanting to get more alone time with Lexi, to get to know her better. Perhaps this was her chance. “I’ve never been to the drive-in before.”

 

 

Lexi picked Clara up at her house around seven that following Friday. There were blankets and pillows in the back seat. But the first thing she’d noticed wasn’t that. It was the fact that it was an old-timer convertible. She didn’t know what model or even brand, but what did that matter when her date- was it her date? – came to pick her up in this incredible looking car. They made comfortable small talk all the way there before finding a good spot to watch the movie. Lexi put the radio on the right frequency to listen to the audio of the movie before turning back towards Clara.   
“It can get cold, so I brought us blankets and pillows to make us comfortable.”

“You’re prepared for everything, aren’t you?” That made Lexi chuckle. In the few weeks she’d known the girl, she’d never truly seen her smile big, or laugh. A chuckle was a miraculous thing, happening only once every blue moon, and she understood why it was best to keep it that way. Lexi’s laugh was adorable and it seemed like the most heavenly sound in the world. Lexa’s laugh – of the time she and Clarke had made love – sprang into her memories and with that came Clarke’s feelings. She cursed the memory. It clouded her judgment. Was she truly developing something for Lexi, or was this Clarke looking at Lexa, sharing one of their most intimate moments together?

“Except for snacks. I do have water with me, but I figured the popcorn is best here.”   
“You’re forgiven. I’ll go grab us some.”   
“No, it’s my treat, I asked you out, so I’m buying,” Lexi insisted.   
“Oh please, you took care of everything. This is my treat. Salty or sweet?”   
“Sweet of course,” Lexi looked up at her as she got out of the car. _Did she just wink at me?_ Clara got to the stand where she bought a large popcorn for both of them. It was expensive, which was to be expected, but she didn’t care.

 

When she got back to the car, she handed Lexi the carton full of popcorn and got settled in her seat. In return, Lexi handed her a blanket and took two pillows. She put one behind her back and handed another to Clara.   
“The big blanket’s the warmest, I figured we could share.” She didn’t mind one bit. The car was pretty small, so they sat close together. Lexi opened the roof up and they sat back, waiting for the movie to start. “Thanks for the popcorn, by the way.”  
“I just hope it’s good. They really overprice that stuff. I am not even going to ask how much the tickets were to this thing.” Lexi bit her lip to keep herself from grinning, but failed.   
“Not going to lie, it wasn’t cheap. But it’s worth it, I promise you that.”

“Oh, I’m already enjoying myself,” Clara smirked. She was leaning in towards the middle while Lexi did the same. She blamed it on the cold. But underneath the warm blanket, and with Lexi sitting beside her, it was anything but cold.

 

The entire movie long, she couldn’t help but sneak glances at Lexi. She looked beautiful. Of course she’d noticed that before, but tonight, Lexi seemed incredible. Out of this world really. Which was ironic since she’d been the one to be literally from off the world in whatever past life or other universe was in her head. The fact that she was just now pointing that out to herself was evidence that she was really overthinking stuff too much instead of enjoying the movie with this amazing girl beside her.

Apparently she’d been staring a little too long, because Lexi turned and opened her mouth to say something before noticing Clara was staring at her and giving her a look. Lexi was really good at that, speaking with her face instead of her mouth. Maybe that could come in handy one day. Oh god, Stop Clara, she thought to herself as she began to blush. Lexi glanced down and did that cute lip bite thing she sometimes does and Clara was certain she liked this girl way more than normal for someone you’d known only a few weeks.   
“Are you enjoying the movie?” She meant it to come out smooth and certain, but she had to clear her throat for any sound to come out right. Lexi smiled.   
“Oh yeah.” She smirked meaningfully, “Are you?”

Clara does not blush. Ever. But right now she was lighting up like a christmas lights and it was so not the plan. She just wanted to stay cool and calm, but around Lexi, she turned into a mess. An overthinking, jittery mess.

 

Eventually they did get back to watching the movie. Actually watching it. Not staring at the girl sitting next to her. Whose hand brushed hers sometimes when she grabbed popcorn. Which sent tingles through her spine and made her breathing stock. Whose eyes were sometimes on her, seen from the corners of her eyes. Whose eyes were somehow on the screen, still seen from the corner of her eyes as she watched the girl react to the movie. The entire movie it was like that, and sometimes one of them commented on something they saw. But overall, it was a good movie. It was even better company.

When the two of them reached for the last bit of popcorn at the same time, their hands met again. She froze, unsure of what to do. Lexi on the other hand, seemed to know exactly what to do. Instead of grabbing the last bit of popcorn, she took a light hold of Clara’s hand and lifted it out of the popcorn bucket. In that moment of confusion, she lunged forward with the other hand and grabbed the three perfect pieces of popcorn Clara was craving.

“There’s no way I was just going to let you have the last bit of popcorn.” Lexa was still holding her hand.   
“Oh you play a messy game.” Clara pulled her hand back and crossed her arms in front of her chest, turning towards the screen, and away from Lexi. Lexi’s face fell.   
“Oh come on, you’re mad?” She didn’t respond. She wasn’t mad. She felt… exhilarated. As if this was a game they were playing in between the seriousness of reality.  And in this game, she was so going to lose. There was no way she could even pretend to be mad at her. She could never be mad at Lexi.

 

She was turning towards Lexi when it happened. She saw her sitting there, and then the next moment, everything was black. And then it was orange. People were speaking in a foreign tongue she recognized as Trigedasleng through the ringing noise in her head. It was yellow before her eyes and her arms were tied behind her back. There was a dirty cloth in her mouth. Her arms ached as people were holding them back. _What the fuck?_ She was pushed on her knees.

Then the sack over her head was replaced by a much too bright light. As sudden as the light had come, it blurred out into colors and blurs. Eventually, she was aware of a figure in front of her. A figured looking a lot like… Lexa?

“Hello Clarke.” Her voice was soft, but there was an edge to it.

Then she felt anger. White, hot anger for the girl standing in front of her. But Lexa looked back at her with a neutral look, so different from the last time she’d seen her. Last time had been happiness and smiles. All of her last moments with Lexa had been relatively happy or sentimental. But this was a whole new feeling.

The guy behind her and Lexa were talking, but honestly she couldn’t care less as she stared up at the figure that was causing this rush of emotion. There was something about Prince Rohan that she felt she should know, but the next moment, Lexa was telling one of her respected officers or warriors – she didn’t really know the ranks – and a bald guy to leave them.   
Authority was radiating off Lexa as she ordered her guards to help her up. Now that she was level with Lexa, the gag that was in her mouth was removed.

“I’m sorry that it had to be this way,” Lexa sounded as if she was going to hurt someone for doing that to her later. But she just felt rage. Her ears were ringing and she wasn’t sure what was said until Lexa said the most heartbreaking words Clara had ever known.   
“I need you.”

Clara felt sadness, but Clarke was disgusted. She spit into Lexa’s face and started kicking and screaming against the restraints the guards now had on her.   
_You bitch. I’ll kill you_! She heard her own voice scream. The vision of a shocked Lexa faded and it was replaced by an even more shocked – nevertheless very real – Lexi. Lexi who was holding her face in her two hands. Lexi whose mouth was moving, talking to her without sound, trying to get her attention. Lexi who had the same piercing green eyes, looking into her own. Lexi.

 

“Clara! Clara, you’re okay. You’re safe. I’ve got you.” Lexi’s voice came to her as the ringing in her ears faded into nothingness.

She blinked a couple of times and shook her head as if waking from a nightmare. She only now registered what happened.   
“Clara, you’re back.” A sigh of relief came from Lexi’s lips, her hands still holding her face. It felt nice, comforting, knowing she was real and not just in a flash or dream.

The last actual flash hadn’t been this intense. The dream had, of course. But that had been a dream, and she’d woken up like she usually did. And she’d been alone. This was the first time she’d had a flash this strong. In front of someone else no less. This was a disaster waiting to happen, and in the back of her mind, she’d been expecting it. But actually having it happen – in front of _Lexi_ – was a disaster.

“Are you okay?” The question registered in her mind two seconds after it had been asked but she nodded.   
“Just a little shaken,” she replied. It was the truth. She wasn’t sure how she felt, having just experienced the feelings – such strong feelings of anger and betrayal – from another person only to jump into her own of happiness and bliss.

“You scared me for a moment. Are you sure you don’t need anything? Some water? Sugar?” She shook her head. It wasn’t like she fainted.   
“I’m used to it. It just takes me a moment to recover.” Lexi’s hands left her face and instead took a hold of Clara’s own hands. Clara took this moment to look away from Lexi’s intense look. The credits were rolling on screen and people were filing out. How long had she been out?

“How often does,” Lexi hesitated, unsure of what to call that thing she just saw, “… well, that, happen?”   
“I call it a flash. It’s been a long time since I had one. And they’ve never been as intense as this one.” She took a deep breath before turning to Lexi again. “Can we get out of here? I think I’d like to go home now.”

“Yes, of course.” Lexi let her hands go and started the car. She pulled them out of their spot and got them on the road home. The second she could, she took one of Clara’s hands in her own and moved her thumb in tiny circles across its back. It was a comforting feeling, which she focused on as she lay her head back and looked up at the sky. It was filled with stars. Beautiful bright stars which were nothing more than burning rocks. _Nothing in this world is unspoiled by the other in my mind…_

 

It was nearing eleven pm when they reached Clara’s house.   
“My mom’s not home yet. Her car isn’t in the driveway.” She stated it as her house came into view. It was a fact, but it meant so much more.   
“Do you want me to come in?” She honestly couldn’t have been happier Lexi had picked up on the hint and nodded a little too enthusiastically. Lexi let go of her hand and she immediately missed its warmth.   
“Yeah, I’d like that very much.” She needed to not be alone. Anything but to be alone and overthink this flash and those feelings and that world. She needed Lexi to understand the things she didn’t. To know the things she does. To feel the things she is so absolutely feeling. To _be there_ when she is anything but. It was time.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Extra bit I decided to leave out. Hehe  
> Lexi: “Hey, Clara? Which subjects do we have together? I keep forgetting if it’s four or five classes.”   
> Clara: “Um, PE, Maths, History and English Lit. So, four.”  
> Lexi: “Huh, I could have sworn we had Chemistry.”   
> Clara: *Blushing furiously*“Oh my god, Lexi.” 
> 
> I don't know why but I don't like this chapter. Maybe it's because it's something I've never tried before? Maybe it's because their characters are so much better IRL than in my AU. (When I say IRL you know what I mean.)


End file.
